A Brief Rant

Years ago, when I was pregnant with G, my friend Jess gave me this book by Dave Barry called Babies and Other Hazards of Sex.

It is a fantastic book. I ended up giving it back to Jess when she was pregnant again, but there are parts that I still think of

Take last night. Last night I was thinking of the chapter of the book that talked about a man telling his wife on the way to the barbeque that she should just enjoy herself and he will take care of the baby.

The wife spends the cookout changing diapers, applying sunblock and pulling large insects off the child. This is a few examples in a long list that I cannot remember.

The husband's level of child care involves a tickle to the baby, as he passes the child each time, on the way to get another beer from the cooler.

On the ride home he states that looking after the child was a breeze. This is followed by a sharp implement being jammed into the man's thigh.

Something similar happened last night, although the kid's are not babies. I spent a majority of my evening running around after the kids and getting up maybe 75 times at dinner to cut meat or speak to the children seated at the table next to me.

This was after waking up at 5:30 to get Lyd ready for Special Olympics and work from 8-3

A certain person was off talking to people for the first part of the night, and then conveniently seated themselves so as to not be able to get up to run interference to the children's hijinks.

Like an idiot, I sat on the end.

By the time we got home I was pooped. I was still supposed to go out, but wouldn't have been able to drive. I was too weak to operate a steering wheel and I would have fallen asleep driving.

Visions of a sharp object jammed into a certain person's thigh was not running through my head.

More like visions of an "accidental" karate chop to the throat.

And next time, I'm just going to sit at the kids table.

I'm totally over it though-can you tell?

Oh! Nagging time!

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Random Helpful Shit and Meditations for The Mildly Irreverent