I kind of hate Saturdays for this reason. It's not so bad when i get there and I get busy, but right now, an hour and fifteen minutes before start time really sucks.
What sucks as well is that I work until midnight, then I have to get up early and go to Mass with the family. Yes. A Catholic one. No me myself, I am not Catholic. My husband is and it's weird because he doesn't agree with a lot of that stuff-you know what I mean.
I am not going to get into why I agree to go to church or anything like that for now. It's too long winded and I just do not have the inclination at the moment.
But the church burns is kind of expensive. It bugs me.
I don't mind giving to charity-in fact I was donating 1/2 of my honey sales to an apiary in Brooklyn. They 're not taking any more donations so I'm going to buy a beehive for some poor person through Heifer International and then make a donation to the Red Cross.
So every week, I gotta give a check in the Ol' envelope.
Then they have these things like taking photos for the church directory. They said that is was an opportunity for a "free" family photo.
That was quite the fiasco. I had to bring the whole crew to pose for picture. Brian said no to my suggestion that we dress up as Kiss. He's no fun at all.
We waited for ever, then we posed forever. The photographer was this surly woman who wouldn't settle for anything mediocre. I couldn't figure out what the hoopla was about until she sat us down and began the hard sell. We got the "we are doing this for free and don't you want to support your church bit. Of course the children were bedazzled by all the nice pictures. We left almost 200 dollars poorer. And then the envelope that Sunday.. I do admit the church gets very little when it soaks us for something like that. Here is a photo of our family photo. i wish I was computer savvy enough to photo shop some Kiss make up
Isn't it nice? Now I have 3 of these kicking around the house, I have no idea what to do with. Want to buy one? They're covered in Irish linen!
They have this thing too called Faith Direct, which takes the money directly out of your bank account each week. I decided that if I am forced to do such a thing, they are going to get a dollar a week.
CCD costs a lot of money, so that week was a poor donation week, but the real kicker was the Harvest Festival. B took the kids (I had to work) and somehow or other V won a goldfish. To me it's the worst thing.
It's supposed to get big and live in a Coi pond. I know it's just a 25 cent fish, but still it's not disposable. I know it's just a cheap feeder fish, but I don't have anything to feed it to. I always feel really bad for goldfish.
They could've splurged for Betas. They are great bowl fish. How many people were they expecting to go to a silly Harvest Festival anyways. I think they could've spent a little more money to get a more suitable fish. Many of those goldfish bought and won that day probably died. I guess that pro-life stuff doesn't pertain to feeder fish.
So that following Sunday, after church, I found myself having to go out and purchase a little tank, gravel and of course the fish just HAD to have Sponge Bob's house. Because the poor fish would be so much poorer without a $10.00 replica of Sponge Bob's house. I think the grand total for that one was close to $50.00.
The church is lucky I didn't have to make these purchases on Saturday night because they would've found a Petco receipt in the church envelope the next day.
But there is a little bit of hope for me and this whole church business.
I'm talking B into taking the kids to church on Saturday night, so I don't have to go on Sunday. So there is a benefit to working late on a Saturday.
As for the fish, he was just a little white and gold thing and I paid him no mind until he began to mature. He started to grow a little patch of dark skin just above his upper lip. With that I began to love him, little Burt Reynolds. I'm planning a Coi pond for sometime in the future for my little mustached friend.
I think I'll put the receipt for that in the collection envelope.
You are friggin hysterical,as usual. But just so you're aware....the churches around town here in Newport give out $100. Or more checks to pretty much anyone who asks so they can pay rent. The people a lot of times are full bown crack heads with jobs. But smoke all their money. So ..as you drop your envelope in every week just think of how u make it possible for a crackhead to keep a roof above his head. Also.I was recently informed that those tiny roses in glass tubes ,ya know? They use those to smoke crack. So you could toss one of those in there. Xo
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