**warning-this post kind of sucks**
Back to that dream the other day. In fact back to that topics I mentioned about worrying whether or not the things I let my children watch is inappropriate.
When I was little, I had no parental filter that stopped me from watching things that would freak me out. One of my first movie memories is staying awake to watch Food Of The Gods at the drive in. I think that my parents intention was for me to fall asleep before that movie. Never worked out that way. Then they never stopped me or left the theatre either. Not that I probably would. Then again, I probably wouldn't bring my kids to a movie like that because I know they would stay awake. Here are some of the movies that stood out for me from the ages of 5-9 (my younger ones ages): Food of the Gods, Heavy Metal, American Pop, Dawn of the Dead, The Blob, Conan the Barbarian,Jaws, John Carpenter's The Thing and Escape From New York. Looking back, I was way way too young for these movies, for the sex, the violence and the bad things that happened to little kids in some of them. I really didn't need to see or know of any of that. Childhood is frightening and dark enough.
One of the movies that really terrified me was Dawn of The Dead. The whole idea of something of that sort happening to everyday people scared the living shit out of me. I though about it. I planned for the zombie apocalypse by the age of 12 in my head. I had the zombie nightmares. Up until the age of 32, those nightmares would have me waking up in a cold sweat, shaking. I would be disturbed for the rest of the day. I still watched zombie movies if one happened to be playing. I read some stories that involved zombies and that apocalypse and they would terrify me. Not scare me in the fun way where you laugh after and feel a bit exhilarated. Terrify me in the awake at 3 in the morning thinking of your mortality, deep dark pit of the soul terrifying. I never really told people because it was a little embarrassing.
The remake of Dawn of the Dead came out a few years back and I decided it was time. I watched that movie over and over until it had little effect on me. I read World War Z and the Walking Dead comics. I still had the dreams. I described the one from the other day. Better dreams would have the sound of zombies moaning off to the side. Worse ones would be running from them. Thankfully I was never eaten in a dream and neither where the kids.
I was surprised and very happy the day that I heard a Colson Whitehead interview for his zombie apocalypse book, "Zone One" where he mentioned that he also had the zombie dreams. That made me happy.
Wow I'm really waxing on about this. I've been working on this silly post for 2 days now. In that time,I further polluted my offsprings minds by going to see The Avengers with them again and signed up for NaNoWriMo summer camp. For the month of June I will write a novel. I have the idea and about 5-6000 words already written and I am about to step WAY WAY WAY out of my comfort zone. It's a bit stressful but with the help of some of my dog's Rescue Remedy maybe I won't get a zombie dream. Perhaps the tsunami one instead.
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