Wednesday, January 16, 2013
I Really Think There Is a God
Totally unexpected snowy day. I kind of knew about it, but had forgotten.
B stood at the window early and said to me, "Wow, it's really snowing out there!"
It's too bad that todays snow, that occurred during the morning "commute", just so happened to coincide with my entire family's decision that it was their turn to be the biggest bunch of dicks on the planet.
I wrote a whole detailed description of the Hell that it really was and then promptly deleted it. It doesn't matter. What matters is that I kept my cool, through people I love yelling at me and even declaring that they shall hate me for the rest of their life.
I will say that at least B apologized for snapping at me on the very stressful drive into work. (I had to drive him in, we only have 1 car) and he wasn't the one who hates me. The rest of them..
ah. screw em.
I am alone now, I'm writing and listening to a new album and will do some shoveling in a bit. I was going to go into work for a few hours to get some stuff done, but called in.
I am in for the day and very happy about it.
In my last post, I mentioned that despite being bullied, I was fortunate enough to have 2 moments at school where I felt totally vindicated. I decided that I would share 1 of the 2. I would say that this moment went a long way in helping me believe that there is a higher power that sometimes looks out for me.
I feel I must give a warning before I continue-there is mention of menstruation. If you are one of those weird people who get totally freaked out buy this, although this happens to every single woman in the world for at least part of her life, by all means stop reading now.
Go look up pictures of puppies or something. Pretend that there is no such thing as periods. Go ahead.
It's really Ok.
I was in 8th grade. It was the second half of 8th grade, so by that time, my friend and savior Charlie, had quit school and abandoned me. He left me for the wolves in a way. Things were so much better when he was in my class. If someone said anything to me, he would threaten to punch them.
In my homeroom class, 2 seats ahead of me, sat Nikki C. Directly behind me was Stephanie C. Total jerks. They were best friends and very mean to me and a lot of other people in my class and the school.
My last period of the day was history, which happened to be taught by my homeroom teacher, Mr Oakley-best teacher ever, for the record.
For this class, I sat up front, in Nikki's homeroom seat.
It had been a long day. When I was younger, I would have these horrid heavy periods. I've written before that it is fortunate that I was never upwind of large predators at those times.
Last period and my period was terrible. I realized with a sinking feeling that I had bled through. Lucky for me I had a sweatshirt handy. When the bell rang, I tied it around my waist and ran out without a backward glance.
I'm glad I didn't look back because it would have been a sleepless night for me, with many fervent prayers that a fastidiously clean janitor with a good work ethic would take charge of cleaning Mr Oakley's room.
Walking by that seat the next morning, my heart sank. Big mess on the seat. It was obvious what happened. I sat down and began to pray that nobody would notice. I was so doomed.
Nikki sauntered in, as she usually did. I think back now and shake my head. What an asshole.
She looked down at her seat before sitting down and cried out in disgust, "Mr Oakley! Somebody ragged all over my seat!"
I sat two seats back, composing my face to make it say, "Rag? Rag on someone's seat? Who would do such a thing?" Inside I was tense, tense, tense. I kind of felt like I was going to puke.
And then, it was like a little speck of Heaven opened and I heard choirs of angels and saw golden light. Only it was really just Mr Oakley's voice saying to Nikki, "Go get a paper towel and clean it up."
I got to watch Nikki clean up my menstrual blood, she did so very dramatically, making noises of disgust as she did so.
I sat in 2 seats back covering my delighted grin.
I suspect Mr Oakley knew who did it, but he never said a word. The man was an angel.
For the rest of that year, whatever Nikki said or did, it didn't matter. I would just look at her and think to myself, "Ha! you had to clean up my rag!"
I rode high on that moment for a long time.
Oh, and today is National Nothing Day, National Fig Newton Day and International Hot & Spicy Food Day.
So Happy Nothing, Newton and Hot & Spicy Food Day!!